Got debt? These financial green flags could make you more dateable. | Earnest

These financial green flags could make you more dateable—even if you have debt

By Corey Buhay | Published on February 3, 2026

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When it comes to dating, size doesn’t always matter—at least where debt is concerned. In 2025, Earnest surveyed more than 1,100 adults across America. The results reveal that many daters are more open-minded about debt than you might think. Many of them believe it’s not about the amount of debt a potential partner has; it’s about how they handle it.

If you’ve been hesitant to reveal your financial baggage to potential suitors, you might be relieved to hear that the size of your debt likely won’t be a dealbreaker. But that’s not the end of the story. Most daters do find debt a turn-off if it’s not balanced by good financial habits. So, if you’re actively dating, that’s all the more reason to rein in your debt, find a repayment plan, and budget like your future depends on it (because it does).

Here’s a closer look at the data, and at the financial behaviors daters are looking for.

Why financial behavior matters more than balances

When our analysts reviewed the data from our Debt and Dating survey, they discovered that more than a third of daters were willing to overlook a partner’s debt under certain circumstances. Some merely wanted transparent communication about the issue. Others wanted to see a clear payoff plan in place.

“Debt is okay if there’s direction…that matters more than the amount,” said one 35-year-old survey respondent. “Mistakes don’t bother me if someone’s working to fix them,” said another, age 27.

Signs of a cultural shift

These responses may indicate a broader culture shift when it comes to debt and dating. In the past, large amounts of debt tended to be rare, and they were often viewed as a symptom of irresponsible financial behavior. But now, with consumer debt reaching an all-time high and more Americans aware of the ballooning student loan crisis, daters are starting to see debt as a fact of life—not as a character flaw. That’s especially true when it comes to student debt.

But though daters tend to be more forgiving, they tend to feel a lot comfortable getting serious if their indebted S.O. engages in certain financial habits. Here’s a closer look.

What would make you overlook a partner’s debt?

We asked more than 1,100 Americans what would convince them to shrug off high debt in a partner. Here’s what they said:

These numbers show that daters value intentionality. They want to know that their person can own past mistakes, come up with a solution, and stick to a plan. They also want to know that the debt is something their partner can handle, whether that’s because they have a high enough income to make the monthly payments, or because they have the skills to problem-solve as circumstances change.

So, if you’re trying to woo a potential partner, it’s your job to demonstrate that you’re a forward-looking person who can take setbacks in stride. Here’s how.

The green flags daters look for (according to the data)

Here are some of the positive financial behaviors daters want to see in a potential partner—especially one with debt.

Actively paying down debt (61%)

As a dater in debt, the biggest green flag you can wave is an active commitment to paying it down. Actions speak louder than words, and daters love to see that you’re well on the path to living your values. That can allay fears about mismatched spending philosophies and help your partner build trust in your determination and financial savvy.

If you’re currently making your minimum payments, see what you can do to accelerate your progress toward payoff. A few options:

High Income (43%)

A large percentage of our survey respondents said that high income would help allay their fears about a date’s debt. It makes sense: If you make a hefty salary, you have a significant financial buffer to insulate you (and your partner) from the repercussions of your debt. If you have student debt, a high salary can also indicate that you’re already seeing the ROI on your loans—and that your past investment is likely to pay future dividends.

If you don’t currently have a high income, there are other things you can do to boost your marketability in the dating pool. Ask your boss what it would take to get a promotion or a pay raise. Take on a side gig or weekend job to bring in extra cash that you can use for additional prepayments.

Transparency (37%)

More than a third of survey participants said transparency was a massive green flag. It makes sense: People want to know that their partner is being honest and upfront about potential obstacles in a relationship—even financial ones. When possible, be forthright and honest about your debt and the circumstances that led to that debt. That can go a long way toward building trust and demonstrating your commitment to clear communication.

Clear Repayment Plan (34%)

Daters love concrete, visible evidence that you’re living your values, and few things feel more tangible than an active payment plan. This goes one step beyond “actively paying down debt” and demonstrates that you’re organized, consistent, and dependable.

If you don’t currently have a payment plan, it might be time to sit down with your debt and find a plan that works for you.

What these green flags tell you about a partner

These financial behaviors aren’t just indicators that you have some financial savvy; they also say something important about your character. A person who’s working on paying down their debts is someone who’s reliable and takes their commitments seriously. A borrower with a clear payment plan is someone who’s looking ahead and preparing for bigger things to come.

Daters are more likely to commit to a partner they can envision a future with. By committing to paying down your debt, you’re demonstrating that you’re ready to get serious and save up for bigger life milestones ahead. A partner with that kind of dependable, future-oriented mindset is someone most folks would consider themselves lucky to settle down with—debt and all.

How to make yourself more financially attractive

If you don’t already have a clear payment plan in mind, that’s okay. The best thing you can do right now is take the first step. Then, by the time you meet your soulmate, you’ll be well on your way to payoff.

As for that first step? Sit down with your debts and figure out how much you owe on each one, what your interest rate is, and what your loan term is. Then, plug those numbers into Earnest’s Payoff Path tool3. This free program will automatically create a custom dashboard just for you. You can use it to create a clearer repayment roadmap and build the kind of financial habits daters value.

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About the Author

Corey Buhay is a writer and editor based in Boulder, Colorado. She’s passionate about literature, the outdoors, and doing her taxes by hand. She has been writing about student loans and personal finance for Earnest since 2019. You’ll find her work in Outside Magazine, Backpacker Magazine, Smithsonian, and The Denver Post.